Hi, my name is Sylvain.
I became a Christian in February 2003.
Here is my testimony; I will try to make it short.
Everything started when 2 planes crashed on the WTC tours.
I am sad that it took an event of such to wake me up from my sleep, but that’s the way it is. I was living believing that God exist but that belief had no impact on the way I lived. But on September 11, 2001, all this started to change. I did not convert to Jesus already but it is at this time that I really started to look for answers.
I always had an interest for prophecies and I believed that Jesus would come back at one time like I was often told when I was younger, but I did not know that I had to get prepared for His coming. I did not know either that He warned us that many false prophets would come in His name. I knew nothing of the Holy Spirit and the fact that I could commune with Jesus today and that I did not have to go through time to speak to Him or to hear from Him. I did not know were to look. (Romans 3:11 there is none that understandeth; there is none that seeketh after God.) So I started to look for answer and the easiest way was on the internet.
I fell in new age at first. Not discerning truth from false yet, I believed many things. They said that pleasing self was a good thing. They said that I had to get rid of this little voice that condemns me in my heart. So I got much deeper in pornography. They were very pleasing to my selfish heart. But I believe that God knew my heart and that I was looking for the Truth what ever it would be. Not that I was without pride but I think He knew that I had ears to hear the Truth and His Word and today I know His Hand was guiding me to Him, the Truth that brings us to the Father. But by my own blindness and my selfish heart I wandered 2 years on these new age sites without finding real answers, but inside of me my heart was crying to God without knowing: “There must be more!” I had the feeling that the life those sites were presenting me was meaningless and was an eternal going around of the same old things.
But the Lord had mercy on me and He started to give me dreams. Knowing nothing of the Bible, I could not know what they meant. I could not know that it was the Holy Spirit working on me to open up my eyes. I could feel His presence when I woke up of certain dreams but I did not know that it was Him. I never had such experience before. Certain dreams really intrigue me and I believed they was an explanation of all this. So again, I started looking on the internet for answers.
I came to this site of a man that pretends to receive messages from God, a prophet. His name was Ray Aguilera. I started to read here and there on his site the messages he pretends it was from God. It was really bizarre, because in some of the texts the words were written has if God himself was speaking directly. The man was not saying God said this and that, but God was speaking directly in the text. It is at this time that I started to recognize the voice of God. The words were very severe but at the same time I could feel that love behind them. Like a father speaking to his children and that he wants their good. I did not know how, but I knew that it was God speaking. He was saying all the time to read the Bible, that it was coming from Him and that he gave it to us to get to know Him better.
So I began to read it. I began with the gospel of John. I had never read anything more than a few bits and pieces of Matthew. I was stunned at the difference of the Jesus I knew. After that I read Acts. This book and all the other books safe the Revelation always seemed to me without any interest. At my surprise I started to see that the Catholic Church (the only church that I knew) was very different of what I was reading in the Bible.
Then, not knowing exactly how, I began to see my sin. I began to take my self in disgust. I was beginning to see that God in His Holiness could not accept me in this state of sin. I could see my selfishness. I was wondering how my wife could tolerate me, a man like me. I was saying to myself that I did not deserve any friend; I did not deserve to be loved. Can somebody love someone that only thinks of himself? It would be absurd.
And it is at this time that I started to see the real Love of God. He always saw this miserable state of my heart and still He waited all this time with patience that I come back to Him. Jesus did not think of himself when coming to this earth, but He was thinking of me! He was doing this for me. I did not have any choice but to accept such a great salvation. Thank you Lord for your sacrifice. I love You!
Thank you for reading me.
God Bless.
Sylvain
